This week I went away to York (a typical, but beautiful, British Midlands city for all you Yanks reading this) and there was pretty much not a single minute that we weren’t discussing where we were going to eat each day. Actually, our time was quite evenly divided as 50% food and 50% shopping, but for the purposes of this post, we’ll say that we were always talking about food.

For the first two nights, we had Italian and Portuguese. Pretty exotic for England, I’ll admit, but for the third night we decided to go full out and try something even further East. In fact, we ventured right out of Europe and ended up in Asia. We went for some traditional Pakistani cuisine at Akbar’s – one of only nine in the world.

We weren’t expecting much – our party of four suspected that Akbar’s would just be the same as any old Indian. Oh, how we were wrong.

For starters, we were brought out some large poppadoms that resembled the moon, along with four dips for us to try. Delicious.

We each ordered a meal – these included Pakistani Chicken Tikka and Lamb Paneer – and a ‘family naan’ to share.

Anyway, this family naan turned out to be more like a family of GIANTS naan. It was so big, we all joked about using it as either an umbrella or a blanket. Seriously, it was at least twice the size of my head and I’m not exaggerating. The meals themselves turned out to be much more than ‘just Indian food’ too. Some were extremely spicy (my cousin had two order two lassi drinks to cool down her throat) but all were bearable enough for us to enjoy our food.

The waiters and chefs were extremely professional yet still had a sense of humour. Service was quick and even the rice was cooked to perfection.

Concluding, it could easily be said that this was the best meal of our stay. It really is worth going a little more outlandish and eating in the East.

Alright then, go on. I’ll indulge your curiosity.

1. The People – Honestly, they were lovely and welcoming and feed you until you think you’re about to burst. Or at least the one’s I met were. I’ve never felt so at home with complete strangers in my life before.

2. The Prices – Currently you get over 4 Zlotty to the Pound. And trust me, the prices are craaaazy.  It’s something like 70p for a pint! And quite a posh meal costs about £3. I know, you can’t quite believe it either.

3. The Jelly – Oh my good God, the frikkin’ jelly! Trust me, you’ve never had jelly like this before. It’s more like the tasty little love-child of jelly and jam. And I love it. Just runny enough to be lovely and warming (yes that’s right you eat it hot from a mug with a spoon) and it’s so sweet and comforting that I can’t stop eating it. Currently I have7 different flavours at home – with Cherry being my personal favourite. If you can get your hands on some then you definitely should.

4. The Food Generally – I love food. Especially the meaty, stodgy food that’s so typical in Poland. Num num num is all I have to say. (However, problems could arise if you’re vegetarian – and especially if you’re Vegan like our own dear Onion.)

Okay, I know that’s not everything, but there are just a couple of the things I really miss about Poland.

- GinGin

What better then, than to start with something completely random and unimportant?! My first review will not be on an exciting new movie, or a recently released album, or even a concert I recently attended. My first review will be about CAKE.

That’s right, the piece of cake that I just ate.

Aesthetically, my cake looked a little like the one above: sweet, sickly, but with a little more icing. Okay, a lot more icing. White, gooey, thick icing that was probably crafted using pig kneecaps and God knows what else… However, my cake still managed to look appetising. So much so, that I’m inclined to give it a name. Let’s call it ‘Eddy’ for now.

Anyway, what should have make me feel physically sick actually made me tempted to buy it, even though I had just eaten a whole box of fries smothered in barbeque sauce. In fact, I wasn’t hungry in the slightest, but the appeal of Eddy’s soft spongey centre pushed me to soak it in custard and nibble away to my heart’s content.

And so I did just that. The custard was actually probably the highlight of the whole dessert – there was no skin, no lumps and it was just the right temperature. This bring me onto another question entirely: How disgusting is it when your custard comes with a healthy dose of lumpage? Not fun.

In terms of portion size… MY GOD there was a lot of it. Seriously, you could probably feed an entire city in Kenya for the amount of cake I ate earlier. I’d say there was actually enough cake there for Bruce Bogtrotter to feel full after eating it. Catch my drift? The cake was HUGE.

On the whole, I’d say my time with Eddy was quite nice. Sweet, sugary fun while it lasted, but in the end, I was sick of him.

- Voice.